I’ve been writing a lot about success, but what about failure? There are two types of failure in the knitwear design field. First, the cold hard rejection of a failed submission. Second, the soul-sucking feeling of being a failure.
It’s not all acceptances and contracts around here. I’d say for every pattern that gets accepted, I have at least five that were rejected.
At first, every rejection was like a stab in the heart. Why didn’t she like my idea?!?! I’d be crushed for days; discouraged from submitting again. But now I just look at it as an opportunity to be a better fit somewhere else. Several times I’ve gotten a design that was originally rejected from one source, accepted into another. It was just a better fit.
When a design gets rejected, I move it into a folder named “Homeless”. When a new call goes out, I always look through that folder first to see if anything there would fit. If I feel like something would, I’m already ahead of the game by being able to use a previous submission again.
Occasionally I end up self-publishing my homeless designs. Turning failures into success is motivating. Mercurial and Mormorio are two examples where I’ve made a lot more money by self-publishing than I would have had they been accepted for publication.
As hard as the rejection is, the worst kind of failure is the second — the kind that we make up when comparing ourselves to others. I do this too much. As a creative trying to “make it” in business, I’m constantly looking at what other successful people are doing. What makes them successful? And why isn’t what I’m doing making me as successful?
Some of this comes from envy. I’m jealous that others seem to come by success so easily when I’m working my butt off. How do they do it? Is it just luck of timing? Or are they really just so much more creatively brilliant than I am? So many times I find myself saying, “Why didn’t I think of that?!”
But some of it comes from something else, something I don’t know the right word for. I don’t envy people that are successful by recycling the same design again and again. I have little respect for the “designer” that publishes the same shawl one hundred times with a different lace border. I have no desire to do that, and hope I never fall into that trap. But I hate that they become successful when doing this. It’s not fair.
Among all this envy and whatever-the-word-is I find that I’m still able to be excited and happy for my friends that get acceptances even when I fail. I know they work hard and I love to see their success. We can’t all be in all the things all the time. If one of us get’s published, that’s something to be excited about. There’s a camaraderie among the hard workers. We need to band together to collectively out-design those pretenders!
All this brings me back to success. Success from hard work is much more satisfying than success from luck or whatever-the-word-is. I have faith that no matter how much of a failure I feel like, if I keep working hard, I’ll find my own success in my own time. Already things are starting to happen for me. Now I need to keep positive, and keep moving forward.
In full disclosure, I was gifted this book by the author, Cheryl Potter, one of my Stitch Sprouts designers.
I don’t usually enjoy “knitting” fiction. Something about it always seems fake. The knitting feels forced and can even take away from the story. The characters are typically flat and stereotypical; the situations are generally eye-roll worthy.
The Broken Circle, Yarns of the Knitting Witches is different. I loved reading this book! The entire fantastical world that Cheryl has created relies on knitting, dyeing, and fiber arts and so these things feel integrated, not added-on. The characters are well developed and interesting. Each has their own interesting story, and I want to know them all.
The plot of the story unfolds amidst colorful descriptions of hand-knits, fiber, and of course, the knitting witches. The world is in trouble and only the knitting witches have the power (maybe) to save it! Magic crystals, fantastical creatures, a war torn land, and clever women come together in this truly enjoyable yarn. The Broken Circle is the first of a trilogy and I’m anxiously awaiting the next installment to be finished so I can find out what happens next.
Along with the novel, a pattern booklet is available with projects inspired by items in the book. I think this is an ingenious addition and really brings the whole story together.
Both the novel and pattern book are available here.
I consider myself both successful and happy. Some people struggle with both of these things. They complain about their life, their job, their general “situation”; but they do nothing to change. Let me tell you about my success and the journey it took to get there.
During high school I got very sick. After a life threatening event caused me to start my junior year late, I started focusing on school. I had a new outlook on life. My new passion was physics. I read everything I could about it and I took all the physics and mathematics classes I was able to take at my silly little school. This focus led me to college as a physics major.
College got me down. I admit, I became lost in the vastness of it. My tiny town and tiny school were mere puddles when compared to the ocean of opportunity at college. I drowned in the combination of scholastic pressure, social awkwardness, medical illness, and waning focus.
I switched my major to computer science because all my friends were doing it. Seriously — this is the most immature, stupid reason to do anything. It was something I was pretty good at without having to put in any effort, which is what made it appealing.
By the end of my short college career, I just wanted out. I ended up dropping out of the honors college in order to graduate early. I was accepted into a Ph.D. program and so I was off to grad school. What?!? Why would I leave school so impatiently just to rush off to another, even bigger, school? Yes, this. I realized my folly about a month after starting graduate studies and dropped out.
I took a job that I hated, mostly because I just needed a job. I started taking art classes online. (I love art. If I could go back and do it all again, I would have majored in english composition and art. I think I would have enjoyed college much more, but this is for another story.) In addition to drawing, I also tried many hobbies including but not limited to beading, poly clay, sewing, journaling, painting porcelain, and spinning yarn.
Boredom led me to switch jobs not once, but twice. I ended up working an hour and a half away doing programming for a government contracting company. My days included driving, working, driving, playing World of Warcraft with coworkers until 2am, sleep, repeat. I realized I had developed an addiction to WoW, I had even quit my art classes. So, I quit playing. What would fill the void? Knitting.
I had started knitting back in college. But in the last few years, had touched it little. Now I picked it up again with fervor. I knitted in every spare moment. I joined a carpool group so that I could knit during the commute even though it meant getting up every day at 4am. My addiction to WoW became an addiction to knitting. Later I took a similar but closer-to-home job. I couldn’t knit in the car, but I knit before and after work. I even knit at work on occasion.
I started designing in 2009 while still at my full time job. After two years of intense focus, designing and knitting in every spare moment, knitwear design became my full time job in 2011. Designing is my focus, my passion. It’s a job I love. Finally.
My focus and dedication to designing has lead to my success. In less than five years, I’ve been published in magazines, worked with yarn companies, am writing a book, and started a related business. I could not do all these things if I was still drawing, writing, beading, etc. If I lacked focus, I would still be working for some man, in some cubical, writing code. I would not be where I am today.
I chose to change my life. It took a while to get there, but I did it. I found that one thing that I love to do and made it my career. It was scary. It required me quitting a good paying job to pursue my dream. And it required, and still requires, a lot of hard work. In the end, I think I’ve been successful.
I’m incredibly busy. To keep from going insane, I’m writing a blog post. Makes sense, right? No? Maybe I’ve already gone insane!
To keep everything going I rely on lists. Lists everywhere. Lists on my keyboard, lists on my computer, lists on the back of my phone. It’s an love song to the post-it note in my house. But just to keep things real, or maybe to make things a little more crazy, I’ll make another list here.
So yeah, very busy. I just need to remember:
I decided to start a new thing, 10 on Tuesdays. This week, what’s in my notions bag?
What notions do you carry around with you?
I apologize in advance. This is a sad, whiney, and pointless post.
My mom has been very sick which means trips home to visit. I love living close enough to visit, but far enough away not to have to visit often. Trips to Hanover are filled with mixed emotions. I love my parents, but I hate the town. Too many bad childhood memories still hit a little close to the heart.
Growing up in Hanover wasn’t fun. I was adopted from South Korea. For many years I was the only non-white person in the entire town. Actually, that isn’t completely true, I remember one African American family moving into a nearby neighborhood. They didn’t stay long because they got chased away by fowl neighbors. Chased. Away. So sad. Even then, as a young child, I saw how wrong this was.
My mom tried to encourage me. Saying I wasn’t any different, that I was just like the other girls. This of course was terribly wrong. Instead of celebrating my uniqueness, I hated it. All throughout grade school I tried to be “just like everyone else”. But I couldn’t change my race. I got teased and harassed daily. I ended up compromising my sense of self in an effort to fit in. I wished I could be chased away.
It wasn’t until I moved to Lancaster for college did I start to feel like I could become myself. It took a long time for me to rediscover exactly who that was. Now that I have found myself, I would never dream of moving back to Hanover.
Of course things are better now. But, still, I cannot shake that very unwelcome feeling. Just driving through this dreary little town, looking at how things are getting run down, imagining the mean spirited people that live in these ever more shoddy looking homes…
I know I just released a pattern earlier this week, but this one just couldn’t wait any longer. My husband has been obsessing over, and constantly playing, the games Borderlands and Borderlands 2. I’ve watched him play so much that I decided to create a shawl inspired by the character Lilith. May I present: Firehawk.
This is a two color shawlette that starts with a lace border knit sideways. Stitches are then picked up and the body is worked from the bottom up. The slipped stitch cable and texture pattern give the illusion of a third color.
The Baah! LaJolla yarn used is fantastically bright and vibrant. Any of the beautifully saturated Baah! colorways would look great for this shawl.
Because it’s worked from the bottom up, your stitch count gets smaller and smaller making the knitting feel both fun and fast.
It’s shape is an exaggerated semi-circle, really more like 3/5 of a circle, meaning it will sit on the shoulders and hug the neck better than a straight top shawl.
Here are the details:
Size: One Size
Measurements: 40” wide by 18” deep
Yarn: Baah! La Jolla (100% merino; 400 yds [366 m]/100 g): pink tourmaline (MC), 1 skein and california poppy (CC), 1 skein
Needles: US #6 [4 mm] 24” circular
Gauge: 22 sts and 34 rows = 4” in st st, BLOCKED
Notions: stitch markers, cable needle, tapestry needle
Just in time for Spring, I’ve been hard at work creating this stunning lace shawl: Mercurial.
Knit from just one skein of Aurora Yarns Silk Dreams (1090 yds), this circular shawl is 44″ in diameter.
Mercurial features three different lace patterns that swirl to create this beautifully sunny medallion.
This shawl starts from the center with just a few stitches and ends with a simple and clean crochet chain bind off.
Here are the details:
Size: One Size
Measurements: 44” diameter
Yarn: Aurora Yarns Silk Dreams (70% superfine merino, 30% silk; 1090 yds 1000 m/100 g): #112 sunshine
Needles: US #3 3.25 mm 24” circular and set of 4 dpns
Gauge: 24 sts and 32 rows = 4” in stockinette st, BLOCKED Notions: US D 3.25mm crochet hook, stitch markers, tapestry needle
The latest issue of Knit.Wear is available for preorder or download! I have a pattern in this issue: Overlay Vest.
© Interweave Press
I’ll be the first to admit, I don’t love the styling on this piece. The front pieces of the sample are 20″ wide…for a 32″ sample, it’s supposed to drape in the front. I would guess this model is wearing it with at least 4-6″ of negative ease. It fits her like it fit me, and I was a 38″ bust.
© Interweave Press
See how the side seam is not on the side, but on the back? Yeah, definitely too small for her.
© Interweave Press
This “vest” is knit with just one skein (for most sizes) of Suri Elegance by The Alpaca Yarn Company. Suri Elegance is a delicious suri alpaca lace weight yarn.
The back is knit from the bottom up, but the fronts are knitted side to side. This makes the pattern fun to knit despite it being stockinette.
Here are the details:
FINISHED SIZE 32 (36, 40, 44, 48)” bust circumference. Vest shown measures 32”.
YARN The Alpaca Yarn Company Suri Elegance (100% suri alpaca; 875 yd 800 m/3 1/2 oz 100 g): #1301 silver, 1 (1, 1, 2, 2) skein(s).
NEEDLES Size 4 (3.5 mm). Adjust needle size if necessary to obtain the correct gauge.
NOTIONS Stitch holder; tapestry needle.
GAUGE 20 sts and 36 rows = 4” in St st.
This week is going to be crazy busy. I’m getting ready to take a trip out to California to attend the TNNA show in Long Beach. I’ll be staying with my favorite designer and friend, Corrina Ferguson. Together we will hit the show floor, schmooze at the social events, and crash at the hotel.
For this trip I’m going as two people. First, as myself the designer. Second, as owner of Stitch Sprouts. It will be a fun adventure, but mostly work.
As a designer I will be meeting with companies who have graciously sent me yarn for the book and making contacts with companies for future projects. I also have a collection in planning for Fall that I will be looking to get yarn ideas for. (Which reminds me, I still have to make sketches and print out proposals…)
As Stitch Sprouts I will be looking for sales reps and otherwise spreading the word about the company. Pattern distribution is the main part of the business and it’s important to have reps out there showing the patterns to potential yarn store customers. I will also be checking out booths and planning to have my own at the Columbus show in June.
I have never flown by myself before. My biggest concern? Getting lost in the airport and missing my flight. Yes, I really do think this could happen, and no, I’m not joking. I am a space cadet. I made sure to book my layovers with plenty of time in between flights to help with this, but you never know…I’ll be that crazy lady you see running frantically through the airport to get to the terminal on the other side only to realize that it’s not even the correct terminal.
The second concern, luggage. I’m going to attempt to take only a carry-on and laptop bag. So, I need to pack light. This really should not be a problem considering that it’s 70-80 degrees in Long Beach; I won’t have to pack any heavy clothes. But I will be taking catalogs, samples to wear, and yarn for knitting.
My last concern is of course about money. I don’t really have the cash to spend (especially with my upcoming surgery), but feel that this trip is important for business. So, in order to help, I’m having a sale! Please check out my Ravelry pattern store. All single patterns are 50% off when you enter the code TNNA at checkout.
Now I have lots of tasks to complete before leaving so if you see me socializing too much online, tell me to get back to work!!
I’ve gone back and forth about posting this…but I do want to start sharing more about myself and my life here on my blog. So, here goes…
In February I’m having surgery. More specifically, I’m getting a hysterectomy. I have a large-to-me (3.6 cm) submucosal uterine fibroid. It’s causing all sorts of issues that I won’t go into, but the bottom line is it has to be treated.
Here were my treatment options:
Most people I talk to about this are worried or sad for me. Sad that I won’t be able to procreate, and worried that I’m undergoing something unnecessary. But I don’t feel worried or sad. Well, ok, I’m worried, but mostly because it’s surgery, and there’s always a fear of complications with any surgery.
Children have never been on the agenda and to quote my doctor, “Uteruses are only good for making babies. If you don’t want babies, there’s not really any reason to have one.”
The good news is I will be keeping my ovaries so I won’t be going through early menopause. This also leaves the door open for egg harvesting if I decide later that I absolutely must have a child from my own DNA.
The surgery is as minimally invasive as it can get. No longer does this procedure require an open abdomen operation. Everything is done through a couple of tiny incisions. I will stay one night in the hospital and then go home. Most normal activities can resume after two weeks and full recovery after six. I’m hoping to get quite a bit of knitting accomplished during my down time.
Do you still have your uterus?
One of my philosophies has become, “start as you mean to go on”. I think this is incredibly obvious, but I only just figured it out maybe 5 years ago. Before this I had started and quit so many things. Educational opportunities, jobs, hobbies, relationships…
Becoming a designer changed me. Not only do I start a new project, but in order to turn my project into a product it has to be finished. Before casting on I have to have a plan and in the end it either has to be mailed away or self published. Admittedly, having to mail a project is much more motivational than self publishing. Again, that self imposed deadline is tricky. But in general, becoming a designer has helped me learn the value of finishing.
When I started the CSI sock collection I wanted to quit half a dozen times. But this philosophy kept me moving forward. It would have been easy to quit, people would have forgiven me, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I had to press on. I started, I had to finish.
Now I try to only start something with a plan as to how it will work, how to finish, and how to continue when all I want to do is quit. This approach keeps my goals attainable. You will never see me start something like a yarn club without being able to finish successfully. This is good for you! You know that if I ever offer something like a club, kal, or e-book I will make good on it. You won’t be left angry or begging after what you paid for. As basic as this concept seems (getting what you paid for), it’s apparently hard for some people to make good. In fact, some people make up wild excuses or even fake their own deaths to get out of commitments.
I didn’t always follow this philosophy, especially with crafting. I have an entire bin full of half finished knitting, crochet, and spinning projects to show for it. As a goal for this year I want to empty this bin. Each project will be finished or frogged. I think cleaning out this backlog of unfinished items will help clear my head space (as well as my home space).
Do you have a stash of unfinished projects? What is your plan?
One of this year’s words for me will be Focus.
What does this mean? Well, as a counter example, after typing “What does this mean?” I went off and put dinner in the oven, read about browers, and bought yarn. This is me NOT focusing.
Not that short term ADD is my arch enemy, just the immediate example. I really want to apply focus to my long term projects; keep the goal in sight, don’t start other long term projects willy nilly.
The first task will be to focus on my book. I have a lot of work to do, and I keep finding myself getting sidetracked by other new shiny things. For example, I find it incredibly hard to stay focused when I keep getting awesome calls for submissions in my inbox. I want to submit to them all! I have so many great ideas and things that would fit these themes perfectly. But alas, I need to buckle down and get to work on the exciting project that is my first, and hopefully not last, book.
One of the most productive times for me is when I’m working on a project with a tight deadline. I stay focused on the project, work on it from start to finish, and am always surprised how fast I complete the work. If I could impose deadlines on my other work, perhaps this will help keep me focused.
But how do I trick myself with a fake deadline? In the back of my head I think, “well, this isn’t a real deadline, so it doesn’t matter if I’m a day late…or a week…or a month…”
This will be the challenge.
How do you stay focused? Do you have any great tips or tricks you want to share with me?
The holiday is now over, and I survived! From my last post, I challenged you to send me some holiday cheer. Two people did, and their stories are great 
Thank you so much! Your words really did help me.
Let me share them with everyone.
From Julia:
The Christmas Eve before my youngest sister was born, my other sister and I were getting a bit impatient with our dad. He was taking forever to get ready and our mom kept giving us chores to do to keep us busy (we were 8 & 11 yrs old btw). He finally called down saying that he was giving up and he’d be there in a second. My sister and I raced to the table, our mom waddled over (she was about 8 months pregnant) and we all sat down and waited. And waited. And waited. We finally hear him coming down the stairs.
He’s wearing a bright red suit (not a Santa outfit, an actual suit!) and has half of his beard shaved off. Think… a mash-up of Two Face and Cruella De Ville. The other half with the beard? Covered in white goo.
My mom gives him this horrified look and asks what on earth he was doing. He said he’d tried to colour his beard white so it’d be a real Santa beard. But it didn’t look right. And the white goo wouldn’t wash off. So he tried to shave it off. He only got half of it shaved off before he got so annoyed with the clogged razor that he gave up.
And so we ate our Christmas meal in fits of giggles. It didn’t help that every time any one of us looked at our dad, we’d just burst into laughter because he kept pulling funny faces whenever he caught us.
It’s just really too bad that we don’t have any photos of it. I’d share one if I could!
From Alyssa:
My Dad’s birthday is a few days before Christmas, and this always gets overshadowed by Christmas. So, one year when I was little (3 or 4 I think) my family decided to throw him a surprise party.
One day I found out, and my mom told me to not tell my dad, or I would be in trouble! Of course, Christmas Eve comes around and his whole family is together for their yearly party, and I act as the distraction.
I tell my dad I want to show him some toys I was playing with, and take him to the basement. My dad was polite, but wanted to get back to the party – I was failing as a distraction! So, I said “You can’t go back! They’re planning a surprise!” When I realized I had spilled the beans I freaked out and started crying, saying that Santa wouldn’t come because I was bad and ruined he surprise. So my Dad said that we would pretend that I hadn’t, and we went back upstairs and no one was the wiser.
Until I went to my mom and told her “I ruined the surprise but it’s ok because Daddy pretended to be surprised!”
I heard this story from my mom, so I’m not sure how true it is… but I always smile when I hear it.
Thank you so very much Julia and Alyssa!
Blah.
Yes, that’s how I feel. I always seem to get the holiday blues. Perhaps it’s the lack of sunlight or the over emphasis on material goods. But for whatever reason for me, the holidays always lack that special cheer everyone else is always going on about.
This year the blues seem especially bad. I’ve been dealing with some health issues and the holidays have snuck up on me. Wasn’t it just October? I’m completely unprepared and unorganized. We haven’t even put up our tree yet…
So, I challenge you to brighten my holiday! Tell me your most heart-warming holiday story in the comments. I’ll pick the best stories and post them on the blog leading up to Christmas day. There may even be prizes…
Ok, so I almost forgot to post about this pattern. Emma’s Overdress is in the newest issue of Jane Austen Knits. Inspired by the lovely overdresses in the movie Emma, this modernized version is more vest than overdress.
© Interweave Press
Knitting starts with the cabled waistband. The skirt and bodice are picked up and knit in opposite directions.
© Interweave Press
A lace edge keeps it feminine and a pretty button adds the perfect accent.
© Interweave Press
© Interweave Press
The Swan’s Island Organic Merino is a dream to work with. It was a new-to-me yarn, and I look forward to using it again and again.
© Interweave Press
Every once in a while a design takes over my life. This is one of those times. Even though I had many other things I needed to be doing, once I started this project I could not put it down. My friend Amanda, who has a wonderful sense of color, asked if I would design a pattern using her gorgeous yarns. How could I say no?
Mormorio is knit from end to end in garter stitch. Then the edge is picked up and knit with an undulating ripple pattern.
A wildly variegated yarn is paired with a subtle semi-solid to create this stripe and lace scarf.
Here are the details:
Size: One Size
Measurements: 14.5” tall at widest point; 60” long
Yarn: Crabapple Yarns Pizzazz (75% merino, 20% nylon, 5% other; 438 yds 401 m/100 g): MC: lady in the snow, CC: vermont falling, 1 skein each
Needles: US #4 3.5 mm 16” circular or straight
Gauge: 24 sts and 36 rows = 4” in garter stitch, BLOCKED Notions: Tapestry needle
I can’t wait until the weather turns cold enough to wear this! I will certainly have it on during Rhinebeck…
I love fall. I love the crisp air and the leaves and the sweaters. This summer I only wore skirts…I’d like to continue doing so into the fall and perhaps winter aided by tights and leg warmers.
Leg warmers are one of those items that you either love or hate. As a ballerina, I grew to love them. They have been trying to make a comeback for some time, but I pretty much hate all the ones in the stores. You know the ones, they come together with ribbing on both ends and are worn scrunched up over the calf…Anyway, I knew what I wanted so I decided to design my own. The result, Riscaldare.
Riscaldare means to warm or heat up. Let these pretty leg warmers warm you up all winter. A boot-leg shape flows over the tops of your shoes without creating extra bulk around the ankle and the pretty lace edge adds a feminine touch.
Simple, feminine, functional. I’ve already worn them out and love them – I want to wear them all the time!
I will wear mine over tights which help hold them up. But if you don’t, or maybe you just want a little more decoration, you can use the top row of eyelets to thread a ribbon or icord ties. Here are the details:
Size: Small (Medium, Large) show in Medium
Measurements: 10.5 (14, 17.5)” calf circumference, variable height
Yarn: Cascade Yarn 220 Heathers (100% wool; 220 yds 201 m/100 g): #2441 2 (3, 3) skeins
Needles: US #7 4.5 mm 16” circular or dpns
Gauge: 20 sts and 27 rows = 4” in stockinette stitch, BLOCKED. Adjust needle size to obtain the correct gauge.
Notions: Stitch marker, tapestry needle, optional: ribbons
Get the pattern:
